Week 5: Spiritual Warfare

"And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast."
I Peter 5:10 (NIV)

Richland Creek

This week we spent camping at Richland Creek in the Ozarks National Forest with YWAM Madison's Rescue Ops DTS, totaling around 50 people. We also brought along our speaker for a couple days, Kevin Rusack, with the topic "Spiritual Warfare". Kevin was only taught us on Tuesday and Wednesday, leaving Thursday morning, which you'll understand why later. If I could take one thing out of the teaching we received for those two days, it would be the magnitude at which our actions affect the spiritual realm and how we do make a difference in the power the Enemy has. I know that statement sounds vague, but it really stood out to me as a mere human that I could make a difference through praying, worshiping, and preaching the Word. A more extended list of things that stood out to me follows:

- Spiritual Warfare is not simply a "prayer prayed" or a "demon rebuked", rather it is a lifestyle

- The two extremes of Spiritual War is over-emphasis and under-emphasis (believing that demons are a part of all bad activity or that the Enemy isn't really there and can be ignored; both of which are not helpful)

- We should be aware but not impressed of the Devil's power

- ADD MORE

Besides the lessons Kevin gave us, we had camp activities as well. We split all of the students up into 4 groups, each with members from YWAM Ozarks and Madison, with which we did the activities. We learned about building shelters, starting fires with flint and magnesium, purifying water, handling medical situations, and being able to navigate around with a map and compass. We also went for a small hike to see a couple waterfalls, one of which was Twin Falls (shown below).

Twin Falls

Those events were during the afternoons of Tuesday and Wednesday. Thursday morning we had our Solo time, which, if you remember from my last backpacking trip, is a 2.5 hour time span of us each going out into nature by ourselves and spending time with God in nature. After a bit of wandering downstream, I found a little strip of water that I sat by for my Solo (shown below). During the Solo, I finished up I Kings, which I had been reading through on my own time. I spent a bit more time looking over I Peter 5:10 as well as well as II Corinthians 4:16-18, but more on that later.

And then Thursday afternoon came along. We were informed during lunch that we would be packing up camp and departing for a new campsite, but there was a catch. We would be hiking out with just our teams, with tarps for shelter instead of tents, without a set trail to follow, and with only flint and magnesium to start a fire. We had a leader, navigator, and radio operator assigned for each team, the navigator given a map showing where we would be hiking to and staying the night. My team's hiking trail went from the camp to a road several miles (through brush and hills) away, where we would be picked up the following day at noon. I was stoked (and naive). We packed up all we could, had our gear checked, got our food for the next day, and left camp around 2:45pm. Our designation followed the same trail we hiked to Twin Falls (which took about an hour) and once we got there we bush-wacked uphill for about twice the distance it took us to get to Twin Falls. Eventually we came to a random very eery-looking house surrounded by fog and barb-wired fences. We knew we were close to the road at this point, but couldn't find a way around the house in the direction we were going, so we decided to follow a trail that was inside the barb-wired fence, but not necessarily on the property, and then we came up to another house that we knew was on the road; we weren't sure if the trail we were following would bring us to the road, so we quickly went under another barb-wired fence, over a wooden fence, and walked down the very long dirt driveway until we got past the gate and got on the road.

The first eery house

Thank you to the Steen's for giving us a shortcut to the road!

 We got to the road at about 6:30, very content because we knew that we were where we needed to be and didn't have to do any hiking in the morning. Our next thing to do was find a place to set up shelter for the night, so we walked down a bit and found a fallen tree a little ways into the forest that looked ideal to lay some tarps over, which is just what we did. We put a tarp under the fallen tree and draped two tarps over it, holding them down with rocks, rope, and sticks. We changed into dry clothes, got our dinners (these dinners were MRE's - Meals Ready-to-Eat - and were not good... at all), and piled all 12 of us into this small shelter. We started trying to go to bed at 7:30pm, which is when the longest night of my life began. We were all still freezing cold, it was raining and windy, causing the tarps to get loose from what held them down and got those of us closest to the outside wet and pounded in the face with cold wind. We were able to sleep in intervals of two to three hours before waking up again, seemingly simultaneously. The rest I had that evening was as follows:

8:00-10:00pm - Unsteady sleep/Expecting a bear to come and maul me as I was laying half outside the tarp

10:00pm-1:00am - Not being able to sleep whatsoever, resulting in me and a few others telling and solving riddles and telling extremely cheesy jokes

1:00-4:00am - Unsteady sleep again and feeling as if my feet were going to fall off as they were being pinched between two other people, resulting in me giving up all attempts to sleep inside the tarp and just letting my whole body except for my head lay outside the tarp

4:00-7:00am - Sleep extremely well surprisingly, waking up at 7:00 to the sunrise, realizing that there was nothing to be done until they picked us up, went back to sleep

7:00am-10:00am - Sleep/slowly woke up and ate breakfast

By 10:00 we had finally received a radio call from one of the staff (we had been trying since last night, turns out the area they told us to make camp was too far away from the base camp) who was going out for a drive. We communicated with them and told them we were on the right road, but for some reason it was very difficult for us to make that clear to them. Eventually, a man rode down, from the house whose yard we ran across, in a four-wheeler to us (we assumed he was Mr. Steen) to find out why his dog had been barking last night and this morning. When he found out we were simply hikers and we were waiting for our rides to pick us up, he offered help by letting us know exactly where we were and offering to give socks to those of us who didn't bring an extra pair and our only pair was soaking wet. He was a big help in telling the staff via radio where we were, and we were picked up around 11:30, concluding our adventure in the Ozarks National Forest.

Our humble abode

Bonding happened that night

Shout-out to Mr. Steen! (The elderly gentleman on the four-wheeler)

Besides the teachings and adventures I had this week, God had been working inside of me as well. Ever since last week when I felt the Holy Spirit speak to me and introduce a new career option, I have been wrestling and getting quite frustrated with the whole scenario. I know that this time now is a time of confirmation and waiting on the Lord to make things clear for me, and I know that I don't need to know right now because there's not much I can do to further that decision being in Arkansas with YWAM, which I am thankful for. But I've been finding myself frustrated with God putting me in a position where I don't know what is going to happen in the future and for making me feel like I'm being pulled this way and that without apparent reason. I really wanted to figure out what in the world God was thinking and why He has been putting me through this, when I looked at my nametag on the door to my room.

This really hit home for me, and I was then led to the following verses as well:

"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me."
Psalm 51:10-12 (NIV)

The last sentence of that passage screamed out to me to restore joy into my life and for me to have a willing spirit as God was calling me to trust Him in this next part of my life. Going into the camping trip, I was still struggling and battling internally, when during one evening after worship a friend noticed the subdued spirit I had. He asked me, "Are you having growing pains man?" Immediately I lifted my head up and couldn't help but smile.
"That is the best possible word I could use right now." I replied.
"The Holy Spirit gave it to me to tell you."
That moment I knew that what was going on in my life right now was for the best, I didn't fully understand what was going on exactly, but I had a much more optimistic view of it.

Another time while camping, a different friend of mine talked to me and asked how I was doing since the experience I had (I had vocalized what the Holy Spirit had seemingly showed me to the whole class and staff). I did my best to express what I was feeling and she totally understood. She too had gone a drastic change in her life, I'd say worse than mine, and talked to me about how she had been dealing with her change and what had been helping her. She spoke truth into my scenario and lead me to I Peter 5:10 which I read during my Solo. It goes as follows:

"And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast." (NIV)

After reading this I was also lead to this passage:

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
II Corinthians 4:16-18 (NIV)

A sight we were fortunate enough to pass by on our bush-wacking adventure

 There could be no better phrase than growing pains to encapsulate what I've been going through the past week. It still is easier said than done the concept of "it will all be worth it in the end", but it is so true, and I have to keep reassuring it to myself day by day. Thankfully I am able to have great friends who can show me light in this darkness and lend wise words in times of my foolishness. Above all else though, I am thankful for the Holy Spirit teaching me as I go and the Word to constantly bring me back to God and His perfect will.

Week 4: Holy Spirit

"But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you."
John 14:26 (NIV)

I've been looking forward to this week ever since this DTS began. The Holy Spirit has always been a vague concept for me to grasp and I've never truly understood his role in the trinity and, for that matter, in my life personally. That being said, I had a lot of expectations going into this week; finding out who the Holy Spirit really is, what he does, and how he is significant in my life were the big questions on my mind, and they were all answered to me quite clearly. I also had the expectation that this knowledge would  in some way change my life's path to some degree, I don't know what specifically that change would be, but I figured it would be slight. I had no idea how wrong I would be and just how big the change would be after all. I guess it wasn't really the knowledge of the Holy Spirit that caused the change, but the Holy Spirit was involved for sure. I'll go more into this later; bear with me.

The speaker we had for this week was Mike Esposito, a short, buff, loud Italian born in the Bronx and now a YWAM base director in Atlanta, Georgia as well as a pastor. With him as the teacher of this topic, it was not a challenge whatsoever to pay attention in class and hear what he had to say about the Holy Spirit, which I was very thankful for as I was not wanting to miss a word. He started the first day by giving a general and broad introduction to the Holy Spirit as well as give a layout for the week. The layout for the week was typical with classes being every morning, except because of prior arrangements, Mike was having to leave early Friday morning, causing us to have our last session on Thursday night. He went on to say that the last session wasn't going to be a typical class time; it would consist of us waiting on the Holy Spirit to "fill us"; more on this soon. The introduction he gave us was largely focused on how the biggest difference between now and the Old Testament was that in the O.T. the people were under the Old Covenant between them and God (Sacrifices, temples, and laws given by God; The Ten Commandments) and now we are under the New Covenant, which is far superior to the Old Covenant as the Bible says. He went onto say the Holy Spirit has always been active in mankind and that it is not a new concept that came along with the New Covenant. The Holy Spirit did have different roles under the Old and New Covenants, however. Under the Old, the Holy Spirit was with, never in, the people, and he could come and go from people as God chose. Under the New, the Holy Spirit comes in us when we accept and believe in Christ and he stays in us as well.

I could go on and explain everything that Mike taught us this week, but I'm not a fan of writing obnoxiously long posts, and I'm sure none of you are fans of reading such posts either! So here is a summary of other topics he touched on:

- People were saved in the Old Testament just like we are saved now; by faith.

- Jesus did not start his ministry until the Holy Spirit came upon him and anointed him after he was baptized by John the Baptist.

- God's kindness is what leads people to repentance, not condemnation, therefore not only are we advised to not judge and condemn people because of our own sins, but also because it does no good to people and it does not show the love of God. Furthermore, Jesus did not come to bring condemnation (John 3:17), so what makes us think we should as well?

- The Holy Spirit is what tells us what God is thinking because he is the only one who knows what God is thinking. Also, what he tells us is what we are meant to know, and what he doesn't tell us we are meant to not know; very simple yet very important.

- Slow obedience is disobedience.

- The Principle of No-Failure: When we hear a call we think is from the Holy Spirit, pray about it, counsel with a spiritual leader, and take action accordingly, we will never fail. We will make mistakes, but mistakes are merely teachers for success. Also, even if our aim is off, because we are taking action out of faith, God will redirect our path to go back towards Him because He is more committed to our life than we will ever be.

- Because the Holy Spirit is a Spirit of Regeneration, we are not obligated to continually live sinfully or live in generational sins; we are no longer "stuck" because the Holy Spirit redeems and heals us.

- The empowerment of the Holy Spirit and the various reactions people have to feeling the Holy Spirit's presence (laughter, falling, dancing, singing, etc.).

Now about Thursday night. This is where the change that twisted my life originated. The premise for this night was that we were going to sit and wait on the Holy Spirit to fill us and empower us, just as the disciples did (Acts 1:7, 8). Their waiting resulted in flaming tongues coming into their presence and everyone hearing what the disciples were saying in their own languages (Acts 2:1-8). Quite honestly, we weren't expecting flaming tongues. The reason the disciples were waiting for the Holy Spirit to empower them was so that they would be able to do the most for the glory of God and be "witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth." (Acts 1:8). We were waiting on the Holy Spirit to talk to us and tell us things that would help us be better servants. We were trying to not set any expectation but we were preparing ourselves by praying throughout the day to have our hearts and souls open in order to receive what God wanted to tell us in its entirety. Along with waiting on the Spirit, we were informed that the staff and Mike would be coming to us and pray for the Spirit to come and make himself and his will known to us. Also, they would keep their mind open for the Spirit to come and tell them any words that were directed towards us students. Throughout this whole day we did our best to not set any bar for how well the night would go, but we were most definitely excited.

A bit of background information on my part before talking about what happened that night. My whole life I have had a strong desire to have a career that would be significant. Now, by significant, I meant your stereotypical careers that would "make a difference" while also making a steady and reliable income. I never had a desire to be a rich and greedy man, but I didn't want to just barely be able to pay the bills and support my family either. In my case, the two jobs that circled throughout my thoughts over the years were in the fields of engineering and medical. Basically, I wanted a job that would make a difference so I would feel good morally and as a Christian while also making good money so I would feel safe; I wanted safe and easy Christianity.

As of Winter Quarter earlier this year I had felt strongly that I was meant to pursue being a doctor and incorporate some medical mission work as well. I was convinced this was correct because it was a good career and would have Christian attributes being on the mission field. I was so content with that decision that I felt God was convicting me to pursue it. The more I thought about it, the more excited about it I got and the more I looked forward to being a doctor, making money, being able to pay off school debts within a few years, and serving God all at the same time. It was perfect and any other career ideas that popped in my head I quickly dismissed.

Last week during our lesson on The Nature and Character of God, Barb gave us a bit of time to think about things on this world that we were holding onto tighter than we were holding onto God; things we weren't willing to give up for God. The second that she brought that up, my mind shouted out my pursuing of being a doctor. I was so shocked by it and was so against it that I shoved it back into the depths of my mind and convinced myself that it was not from God, it was my mind playing tricks on me. It took a little while for me to suppress the thoughts, but after a while I was able to do it and I forgot about it.

Now back to Thursday night. I felt very prepared for what the Holy Spirit had to tell me and had prayed earnestly and intensely for God to feel welcome to come into my heart and speak the truth to me. The night started out with a couple worship songs and transferred to one of the staff playing the piano and eventually that transitioned to some quiet music being played from the speakers. I knelt and tried to clear my mind and just wait for the Spirit to speak to me, but I didn't receive anything. After worship ended, Mike, my one-on-one, Sean, and Josh, the DTS leader approached me first and started praying for me and feeding me information the Spirit had told them to give me. Sean was hearing a lot about knowledge and Solomon's wisdom and how God was wanting me to have that same wisdom, which sounded good to me because wisdom and knowledge lined up with being a doctor. And then Mike and Josh prayed for me and told me what they were hearing. Josh saw me climbing great heights, like tall mountains, and achieving significant accomplishments, another sign towards being a doctor, but then he said that God was wanting me to be a Teacher of the Word, and Mike said that he heard Proclaimer of the Word. What? That didn't seem to line up. The more I thought about it, the more I thought it sounded like God was wanting me to be a Theology Professor or maybe even a pastor. Later another staff came up and told me how I was to think of the Church as Jesus did; as His bride. He said I would lead the Church to its full potential and I would mature as a man and have the Church mature with me. This sounded more and more like a pastor, and I started to freak out.

I've always disliked the idea of me being a pastor. Always. Not only for the simple reason that I was not a good public speaker and always stood shaking as I spoke, but for the over-all reason that it would require total reliance on God. For income, for material to present, for everything. I was petrified. I then remembered a couple of verses one of the staff had presented me earlier in the event:

"Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their ancestors to give them."
Joshua 1:6 (NIV)

Well that was somewhat encouraging, but I still was skeptical and really felt that I was not capable of the job. Sure God said for me to be strong and courageous, but that's always easier said than done I felt, and then I read the second verse:

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."
Joshua 1:9 (NIV) (emphasis mine)

Ouch. That hit me hard. All this time I had been telling God that I was ready and that I was wanting Him to tell me His will, but I was never truly receptive until tonight, and He took advantage of it. I was telling Him to give me a stable job and then let me serve Him, but that was never in His plan. I was never willing to totally be reliant on Him. I had heard story after story growing up in the church about people being supplied in every way in their life by God, yet I never thought that that's how God had planned my life to be. As soon as I realized this, what felt like a wave of comfort and peace washed over me. I felt content letting God speak to me and how He had been honest with me, which is what I wanted. I now know that this time I have here at the DTS is a time God has given me for confirmation and for me to be in constant openness towards what He has to tell me. It's an exciting time in my life that I'm going through right now as well as, at times, stressful as I am waiting on the Lord to continue to direct me and teach me, but praise God for family and friends, new and old, who encourage me along the way!

Week 3: The Nature and Character of God

"I will harden the hearts of the Egyptians so that they will go in after them. And I will gain glory through Pharaoh and all his army through his chariots and his horsemen. The Egyptians will know that I am the LORD when I gain glory through Pharaoh, his chariots and his horsemen." - Exodus 14:17,18 (NIV)

"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." - I Corinthians 10:31 (NIV)

"May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ." - Romans 15:5,6 (NIV)

"... It is not for your sake, O house of Israel, that I am going to do these things, but for the sake of my holy name, which you have profaned among the nations where you have gone. I will show the holiness of my great name, which has been profaned among the nations, the name you have profaned among them. Then the nations will know that I am the LORD, declares the Sovereign LORD, when I show myself holy through you before their eyes." - Ezekiel 36:22,23 (NIV)

(bold and underlined emphasis mine)

Have you ever taken notice of how many times God refers to us bringing Him glory? He not only refers to us humans bringing him glory, but all things in the universe; the animals, the vegetation, the earth, the cosmos, everything! Sometimes, when we are doing a poor job of giving Him the glory (which is so much more than "sometimes" implies), He takes matters into His own hands to show how amazing He is and that He truly is the LORD. A good example of this would be in Ezekiel. God had been speaking through Ezekiel to the captives in Babylon in Israel, telling them of the judgment they had caused God to invoke upon them time and time again. Eventually, and seemingly unexpectedly, He tells the Israelites that he will bring them out of their captivity and put them back in their land that He promised their ancestors. The same land that they defiled and proved that they did not deserve (Ezekiel 36:24-30). As you can see though in the last verse I quoted above, right before He tells the Israelites what will be done, He makes it clear that He is not doing it for them, but for Himself. He does all of this so that He can show the world just how holy He is. Have you ever wondered why God is so emphatic on showing how awesome He is?

I know I hadn't ever thought twice of it. In previous Bible readings I would probably just gloss over it. This was true up until this last Spring. For some reason I started to be quite interested in how atheists thought (and still do right now to be honest). Now, before anyone raises any eyebrows suspiciously or begins to question the authenticity of my faith, let me explain. I have often wondered what it is that makes people not believe in God, and for most of my life that's as far as I went; simply wondering. With this wondering I would draw up scenarios that I thought made atheists not choose God, and from those scenarios (that I constructed I remind you) I was able to come up with very good arguments of my own and felt quite proud of myself being able to convert these atheists I had fabricated in my mind. Somehow I was able to take a step back in this thinking and realize just how silly and meaningless this thought process was. This led me to realize that the best way to figure out what goes on in an atheist's mind is to simply read the things they posted, watch videos about them, and actually talk to them in person (unfortunately I haven't many atheist friends, so this has not happened so much... yet). From that point on I've made it somewhat a hobby of mine to look into it. I began watching videos of debates between atheists and Christians and read up on some sites, and I found out that some atheists had taken notice of God's demand for us to glorify Him and turned it into an attack. The specific post that I saw spoke of God creating humanity just to show off His awesomeness and no other reason, making Him seem like an egotistical dictator in need of a constant power-boost/reaffirmation of his magnificence. Reading this made me frustrated at the accusation of course, but at the same time it had be wondering, "What is the reason for God striving to be glorified in all ways?" I knew that the god atheists were describing was not the God I worshiped, so it put me in a trap trying to figure out what the reasoning was after all.

A close-up of the sunrise we get to see every morning from the cafeteria

It was not until I came here, specifically this week, that the answer was presented to me. I was reading the same passage in Ezekiel I mentioned earlier, and somehow, the Lord presented Himself to me and made it very clear what His intentions were. He showed me how people would not follow Him and trust Him if His might and power and glory and grace was not shouted out and expressed by His people and all of creation. It made all the sense in the world! Why would I want to follow a God that didn't do marvelous things, make wonderful creations, and cause humans to do no less than cry out His majesty and worship everything about Him? God does not need us little humans to tell Him how almighty He is, He is fully aware of who He is and what He can do (which is not pride, it is humility because He is believing in the truth that He is omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent, and omnificent). He wants us to glorify Him because it is part of the requirement to show how perfect He is to the rest of the world so that they too can worship Him and be saved. Our worshiping and glorifying of Him helps others. This realization was one of most humble lessons I've learned in all my life. It was also re-enforced during the teaching this week. Our speaker was the director of the base here at YWAM Ozarks, Barb Nizza, and she spoke on The Nature and Character of God. The topic that I felt most correlated with my recent learning was titled God wants us to obey Him because He desires our best. The verse she showed us to get the point across was this:

"The law of the LORD is perfect, reviving the soul. The statutes of the LORD are trustworthy, making wise the simple. The precepts of the LORD are right, giving joy to the heart. The commands of the LORD are radiant, giving light to the eyes. The fear of the LORD is pure, enduring forever. The ordinances of the LORD are sure and altogether righteous. They are more precious than gold, than much pure gold; they are sweeter than honey, than honey from the comb. By them is your servant warned; in keeping them there is great reward." - Psalm 19:7-11 (NIV) (emphasis mine)

So many words are able to be used to express how good God's laws and desires and commands are. I see how this glaringly shows how God gives us laws for our benefit, but I then combined this lesson with what I learned earlier. God wants us to glorify Him for the sake of everybody else so that they may find Him and be saved, so I edited the topic a little bit; God wants us to obey Him because He desires our best and the best of the people around us. Our actions affect everybody, so why not make them godly actions?

It has been so exciting this week as God has unfolded to me more and more of His big plan, and I am so thrilled to be a part of it. I am also so very thankful for the rest of the teaching Barb gave us. If I could give an overall statement about what Barb taught us it would be the simple yet all-encompassing statement that God is good. At times I feel that statement is so incredibly lacking to describe God (because it really is), but other times I feel it is all I can possibly say about God because of the many different words that can be implied by the simple word "good". We learned about many more topics including:

- We are valuable because God values us

- The Kingdom of Heaven should be something that we are willing (not grudgingly tolerant) and excited to sell all we have and hold dear to pursue, otherwise we have some prioritizing to do

- The Lord understands our feelings because he has feelings as well; if he didn't have emotions, then how could He help us with ours?

In other news, yesterday (Friday, October the 12th) we were informed of the outreach teams, and I found out that I will be going to Kenya! I shouldn't say found out since I have had a strong feeling from God that Kenya is where He is wanting me to go; this just confirmed His plan for me. It is all so extremely exciting for me to think about as it is becoming more and more real as time goes on. I feel ready right now to go to Africa and do His work, but I know God has much more knowledge for me to attain here as I still have 9 weeks of the lecture phase left, which I am more than willing to do. Every day God seems to be showing Himself to me through new ways and I have been growing more and more confident in this faith I have been fortunate enough to grow up in. It's hard to believe that it's only been 3 weeks that I've been here, yet at the same time I can't believe that I'm already a quarter of the way done with this phase. I hope I continue to make the most of my time here and continue to strive to learn more about God's character and how I am to imitate Him.

View of the sunrise including Ozark (nearly impossible to see, right above the treeline to the left)

Weeks 1 & 2: Foundations and Relationships

"Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God -- this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is -- his good, pleasing and perfect will."
Romans 12:1,2 - My class' theme verse


I boarded the plane at SeaTac Sunday morning for Chicago around 8:30 in the morning. It had been a fantastic weekend filled with fun and visiting friends and family. I had spent the majority of the previous Friday in Seattle visiting wonderful people at SPU, and what a great day that was. I wasn't able to see all of the people I was hoping to, but I did see a good portion which I was very thankful for. I was also able to meet the incoming freshmen on 6th Hill which was beyond cool. They seem like a good bunch of guys, and I know that being on 6th will only grow them. Being able to see my fellow classmates last year as sophomores and leaders on the floor now got me extremely excited for them and I knew without a second guess that they were going to do a great job. They all have the Lord on their side and they all embrace it, so there is no doubt in my mind that the 2012-13 year on 6th will be one-of-a-kind.

I spent Saturday with the family which is just what I needed before I left. Even though I had spent the whole summer working in Wenatchee and living at home, I never really felt like I had really spent time with my family, which was quite depressing for me, so this day was much needed. The day started with my little cousin (I shouldn't be calling her little anymore, not only has she grown a lot but she has matured even more) and her baptism; a very special time for us all. After resting for a few hours at my Aunt and Uncle's house, we left for the Puyallup Fair, a tradition I love, if not for the family bonding then for the scones (trust me, they're fantastic). That all consisted with going on rides, waiting ridiculous amounts of time in line to get some fair food, as well as waiting for about an hour and a half in line with my Aunt for the Extreme Scream, a ride that could make a grown man cry (not saying that I did... or didn't). After that, Saturday ended and Sunday started what seemed like the next minute. We left the house before 6, my siblings, parents, and I, and arrived at SeaTac around 7. I said goodbye to my siblings and my dad and walked into the airport with my mom to get my bags checked and such. We walked all the way to the security checkpoint when we had to go separate ways. I gave my mom a big long hug. She and my dad had done so much for me, not just these past few months in preparation for this adventure with YWAM, but my entire life as I'd gone through changes in school, friendships, my relationship with God, location, and so much more, and I really wanted to make sure I could tell them somehow how much I've appreciated their efforts and their love for me. I still don't think I've given them the thanks that they deserve, they would say, and still do, that I needn't worry about it, but sometimes I can't help but think about it. I said goodbye to her and went through the airport motions and boarded the plane to Chicago, arrived in Chicago, and boarded one last plane towards the state I would be residing in for the next three months.

I arrived in Little Rock, Arkansas around 6:45pm and was picked up by one of the staff, Drew was his name, and began the 2 hour drive to the YWAM Ozarks base right next to Ozark, Arkansas. It's rather easy to have semi-long car rides with somebody who you've never met before and know that you'll be with them for the next few months. You have plenty to talk about, and you ignore the nerves of meeting somebody new because you know you'll have to do it eventually anyway. During that 2 hour drive, Drew filled me in on his life and the incredible events that he had witnessed being a part of YWAM. Stories of physical healing, spiritual healing, and amazing mission adventures were fed to me and I took it all in. The part that got me excited wasn't the information itself, but rather the way the information was given to me. Drew showed genuine care and joy as he told me about his life and what God had been doing, and that is what touched me; he truly meant what he said.

The Ozark Bridge, voted as the 16th most beautiful bridge in the U.S.
Photo Credit: arkansas.com

After two hours we rolled into Ozark, where the population is a bit over 3.5 thousand, the mascot of the high school is the Hillbilly, who is portrayed by the First Baptist Pastor (I learned also that at their football games, whenever the Hillbillies would score a touchdown, the Pastor would shoot a blank out of his shotgun in celebration -- words could not express the amusement I had hearing that). We drove a little bit further and up a hill to the base. At this point it was too dark for me to get a good look at the location, but I'll describe right now anyway. It has the usual necessities - a dorm for housing for the students and most of the staff, an administration building with offices for staff duties and a lobby with Wi-Fi for the students and staff to do work or whatever else, a cafeteria/auditorium for meals and meetings for things like classes and worship, and a shed/barn for storage and tools and such. Also, like the rest of Arkansas (as far as I can tell), it is very green (by my judgment) and surrounded by a plethora (the use of that word was necessary for my personal satisfaction) of trees. I was surprised by the weather when I first arrived, it really was warm, but not as humid as I anticipated (it was a pleasant surprise at the moment... later in the week the humidity started to kick in but only in late afternoon and evening, making going to sleep a real challenge).

I got to meet the rest of the students and staff when I arrived which got me even more excited because they all seemed to be as ready as I was to get this all started! The students' locations are 2 from Canada (B.C. and Saskatchewan), 1 from Texas, 2 from Arkansas, 1 from New Hampshire, 1 from Illinois, 2 from Michigan, 2 from Switzerland, 1 from Georgia, 1 from Tennessee, 2 from Pennsylvania, and 1 from Washington (that would be me!). That first evening was short lived as I was tired from the flying (about 6 hours total from Seattle to Chicago to Arkansas) and was ready to hit the hay!

The view of Ozark from the cafetorium (the lighted portion is the bridge shown above)

 The backs of the small dorm (left) and the Admin building (right)
Photo Credit: ywamozarks.com

The next day had a similar format as the rest of the week did. The day started at 6am with a work-out session, breakfast from 6:45-7:15, and quiet time from 7:30-8:30 (personal devotion time in the Bible, while to some an entire hour in the Bible may seem like a long time, I'm learning to really value this time and soon I think I won't be able to go without at least some time devoted to it). From 8:30-9:30 the event varies with the day, but it is either filled with worship (much more involved than the worship that I am used to), meditation on a passage (basically reading a section of a chapter and spending periods of time simply reading over it and analyzing it deeply), or intercession (time spent literally just praying with one another and letting the Holy Spirit guide us all as to what we should pray about, it sounds interesting, and it is interesting, but as we are doing it more and more I am starting to love simply sitting with one another and let God talk to us all). From 9:30-12:30 we have class which is taught by a different speaker every week, this week being Mike Schneider, a youth pastor from Springdale, Arkansas (I'll be going more in-depth with the class sessions later). We'll have lunch from 12:30-1:00, and then from 1:00-3:00 we'll either have free-time, community outreach (if the outreach you have is in the afternoon on Tuesday's, which mine is not), small groups (all the students and staff are split into smaller groups, that are gender-oriented, where they talk about the teachings of the week or just how things are going, great for accountability), or one-on-ones (which is when one student will meet with one staff member who is consistent throughout the entire DTS -- also gender-oriented -- and they talk similarly like small groups do, except it can be much more personal and therefore even better for accountability). From 3:00-5:00 there is work duty, as all students are require to work 10 hours a week, and my work duty happens to be working on the grounds, basically doing physical labor and keeping the campus looking nice. From 5:30-6:00 is dinner and from 7:00-9:00 we'll have free time, worship, a bonus class session, outreach intercession (much like intercession except focused on praying for the mission trips we will be taking part in in a few months), or community outreach if you have an outreach in the evenings on Tuesday's, which I do! My community outreach is in a community called Cass at a vocational school centered towards  people who have had rough upbringings in life. Whether it be a rough family life, drug abuse, dropping out of high school, or what have you, the people here have had rough lives and this school helps them to get back up on their feet and gives them jobs as well. What we do at this school is partake in a Bible Study led by Pastor Gary, a Southern Baptist Pastor in the area. I've only attended one study so far, but I have a good feeling that I will be benefiting from the study as much as the people at the school will. After that the day is pretty much done. We're in our rooms by 10:00 and lights out by 10:30, only to do the same thing the next day! On the weekends, however, we have nothing scheduled besides meals and church on Sunday, so we spend it mostly writing in our journals, reading assigned books, or working on our memory verses.

The first week here seemed to be an extremely long one as it was happening, but not in a bad way at all. The days, as you can see, were packed full of good stuff, so we were always doing something productive from very early in the morning to the night, and I enjoyed it all. A few of the highlights involved chasing down an armadillo and shooting it, causing it to run wildly head-first into the fence (it died after another shot), getting to see the sunrise every day of the week (really hoping to post a picture of that in future posts), making a fool of myself on slacklines, having night runs to Sonic a couple times, and, of course, just getting to know and bond with the students and staff. My one-on-one is named Sean, and his DTS was just last year, and it turns out he's a month older than me, so I'm finding it very cool to be able to talk to someone so close to my age, and yet someone I can learn so much from at the same time.

For classes in the first week, our speaker was, as I mentioned, Mike from Springdale. The topic that he taught us for the first week was "Foundations". To illustrate this topic, he talked about the basics of Discipleship and what things we are to do as we are attending this school, things we should expect, and, above all, to rely on God to teach us things that we could never expect to learn from the classroom. He started out the week with the Parable of the Sower, or rather, the Parable of the Soils as he pointed out to us it is sometimes called, and this second title turns out to be rather interesting. We learned that we could learn from this parable by visualizing ourselves as the soil (the rocky soil, thorny soil, path, and good soil). He talked about how if we are the rocky soil, it means we are too shallow to grow, showing that we do not understand the message properly; we don't have a deep enough knowledge of the Bible to grow. The thorny soil choked out the plant as it would grow, which showed that we would get easily distracted by worldly things such as wealth and power as we would grow and would never get anywhere. The path had the birds come down and eat the seeds right off of it, which showed that we had a spiritual "high" and never had a real relationship and never had any depth, just a feel-good experience. And lastly, the good soil produced a crop, showing that we heard the word and understood it truly. This was the first time I had heard the parable this way and I personally preferred it. He continued to say that the goal of all the classes was to achieve a deep understanding of the message. So this first lesson he taught us has resonated within me ever since and got me thinking about all the lessons and whether or not I had been getting a true and deep understanding. He covered many more topics, so I'll try to just bullet point a few of the key ones:

- 3 elements of Discipleship -- Achieving knowledge of the Bible, understanding that knowledge of the Bible, and gaining wisdom by applying that knowledge to one's life.

- 3 T's of the Christian Life -- Trials, Tests, and Tribulations. We are to expect these in our life and we are to have joy that they are happening because, if handled appropriately, they will grow us.

- Understanding the importance of virtue as well as the importance of knowledge; knowledge without virtue is just a person spitting out Biblical facts but not knowing the character of God and not knowing how to act as a Christian which can be extremely destructive.

- Realizing that all Biblical knowledge attained increases responsibility to live out that knowledge, as well as increases freedom to live because you understand God more and feel more confident in Him.

- 3 D's of growing out of habits or growing new habits -- Desire (Having a want or a sense of need to make a change), Discipline (Actually doing the change and going against what you are used to do -- this is the hardest part), and Delight (Having achieved the change fully, you no longer struggle trying to change yourself, instead it is now a part of you and you embrace it wholly.

We learned a lot more over the course of the first week, and I would love to right more about it, but this post is getting more and more lengthy anyway, so I must continue on.

A map of the Ozark Highlands Trail, starting at Shores Lake

The second week of the DTS we went on our first backpacking trip on the Ozark Highlands Trail. We departed Monday morning and returned Friday afternoon having hiked 18 miles (about 6 of which in pouring rain). The trail was beautiful and full of sights, whether they be small bugs and lizards hanging around, serene creeks and waterfalls, the sounds of the trees rustling and water rushing, the sun leaking through the treetops, or magnificent views from tops of mountains, like the view we got at the top of White Rock Mountain:

White Rock Mountain; Praise the Lord for panoramas!

The entire trip through nature was truly breathtaking and amazing to recognize just how much beauty God possesses and how what we see here on earth is just a sample of what he is capable of. It also made me realize how small I really was in this huge world, in this even larger galaxy in the infinitely massive universe made by the Almighty God, and yet he still looks out for me. As cliche as a thought process that may be, I found it so incredibly true at this sight.

The week's daily schedule involved getting up around 6:30, prepping, eating, and cleaning breakfast, cleaning up what we could until 8:00 when we would have quiet time until 9:00, followed by class which consisted of us listening to videos of Dean Sherman back in the 90's (more about this later) until 12:00 when we would prep, eat, and clean lunch, pack up the rest of our gear, hike about 4 miles, get to the next camp, set it up; prep, eat, and clean dinner, and then sit around the campfire until 9:00 giving life stories and testimonies. This week I would say was definitely when the bonding was cemented between us students as we got to see each other without showers and pampering and we got to listen to each other as we talked about how we got here and our lives. We got to hear coyotes howling almost every night, were attacked by bugs almost every second of every day, had caterpillars dropping from trees 30 feet in the air onto our heads, and even found a swimming hole to chill in for a bit.


The speaker this week was Dean Sherman, or rather just audio of him, and his topic was on Relationships. We would all huddle around the camp with our journals and Bibles as we listened to Dean and all he had to say about relationships. He started off the sessions with passages from I John 3:11 and 4:18-21, talking about the main message in the beginning and still today is about loving one another; relationships. He then made the proposition that every problem in the world was caused by problems in relationships, and therefore, our biggest focus, as Christians, should be relationships. He continued with the passage from Romans 12:3 and said how the number one problem in relationships was a pride problem, therefore every problem in the world had started with someone being proud. He wanted to make it known that pride could take two forms though, those being arrogant pride which is what we are familiar with, and inferior pride which we often call self-pity. Since humility is the opposite and the solution to pride then, Dean Sherman pointed out that the solution to every problem in the world was humility. This was the first point and, in my opinion, the strongest point he made in the entire series, even though the series was full of great stuff the entire time. I'll post a few of the key points I noted throughout the series:

- Loving God and loving others are one in the same; we cannot love God without loving others and we cannot truly love others as God intended without loving God as well.

- Nothing I am, physically or emotionally, causes me to violate God's truth because God created who you are, physically and emotionally, and he would not create you in a way that would contradict himself.

- God only says no to things because they are not logical; He always has a reason and his reason is the most logical as well as the most loving. Therefore we are never to fear following God's Truth because it is always right and there is always a reason, he supplies some of those reasons in the Bible and some He does not explain, but we are to have faith that He has reasons.

- Breaking up is hard to do because it involves a nerve being extended to an atmosphere it was never meant to be in, that atmosphere being a place where it is not embraced. God had it intended that if we were to expose ourselves to another, that other person would embrace it. This also means that we are to approach dating in a healthy way.

I suppose this post has run on long enough, I'm sure the future posts will not be near as long as I will try much harder to keep them weekly and won't have to give large amounts of background information, but if you made it this far in the post then congratulations and thank you! I appreciate and admire your perseverance. Also, next week I believe is when the outreaches will be decided for the students, so if you could please keep me as well as the rest of the students in your prayers, as well as the staff as they make a potentially very important decision, it would be extremely appreciated. I am so incredibly blessed to be here at this time of my life, and I know that there are many more teachers and lessons and experiences for me to go through, and I am going to love it the entire time. I look back to my class' theme verse that I wrote at the beginning of this post, and I keep staring at the words: "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." It is so easy for us all to return to the daily habit of the world after we are on a spiritual high, but Paul says that we are not to do that as Christians. When we undergo a spiritual retreat or sermon or DTS, our minds are being renewed, we are learning more and more about God and what He is all about and therefore what we as Christians are about, and we are supposed to be transformed by it. I pray that I follow this verse and the rest of the Bible so much that when this is all said and done, I truly will be transformed.